Mental health and depression are still a taboo in our country, our India, a country where over 5 crore people suffer from depression, and approximately 7.5% of the total population suffers from some or the other kind of mental disorder. If this is the situation in case of just depression, one shudders to think what would be condition if the same is combined with sex, yet another taboo. Ironical, isn’t it? That the land of Kama Sutra is so hesitant to talk about sex, let alone the issues that may come along regarding sexual routine and well-being.
And that brings us to the topic of today, postpartum depression and how it affects your sexual life, plus, how can you get the drive back.
Pregnancy is a critical phase in a woman’s life. Imagine being on periods for nine whole months, that is the level and duration of anxiety and mood swings, along with fluctuating health issues, that occur during the term. Yes, it is a beautiful phase but one cannot and should not deny the problems that come with it, and postpartum depression is one of it, only that, as the name suggests, it happens after the delivery, and the onset of parenthood.
Sex and physical intimacy is an important and integral part of any relationship in the sense it gives one a boost through kick in hormones. Surveys and medical reports suggest that women feel more attractive, jovial, and beautiful post-sex, and a steady physical and emotional relationship maintains the beautiful balance in love life. Though sexual intercourse is not an issue in the initial phases of pregnancy, but it is only in the last trimester, or as per doctor’s recommendation, that it has to cease. The moment it does, the fears, combined with the worst of hormonal onset, wrecks a havoc on brain, causing one to have doubts on everything that gives your morale a boost.
A woman may start feeling unwanted, dejected, and unattractive, aggravating self-doubts, anxiety, which further develops into depression, after the delivery, thanks to the crazy bodily and hormonal changes she goes through. To top it all, breasts that ache all the time due to feeding, eyes that are droopy due to sleepless nights, and continuous tiredness, does nothing to curb the same. Having sex after a baby has been born is no easy feat.
In our country, as we said, mental health is not considered a matter of concern, in many households. So imagine if someone says about postpartum depression and the fact that it has led to you feeling less and less inclined towards having sex, it won’t be talked about. And with that, the question of consulting a doctor, an expert, also goes out the window.
The whole concept of a new individual who is so attached too your body and is the only one who finds comfort in your touch, does seem to freak women out. Postpartum depression sets its roots deep when you gross out from the fact that your baby will need to suckle on your breast and handle it in whatever way it will, to drink the elixir meant for it. This sudden restraint on the authority one has over her own body and time, starts making one repulse anyone’s touch, even the husband.
However, no matter how scary the scenario, remember, pregnancy, the process of creating, carrying, and finally delivering a life of your own, is a beautiful process. Let it fill you and warm you up. Tell yourself every day that you are a confident and beautiful woman. We are sure you must be having husband who happily revel in the glow of their huge yet beautiful wife, the mother of their child. Let the power of that love consume you, always.
Believe that you are always attractive, by default, and don’t let anyone ruin the vibe. The postpartum depression is a sign of everything that goes wrong during the term of pregnancy, and you should treat it in its initial days, likewise. However, in severe cases, you should always stand up and be ready to declare that you are in need of help and therapy, for experts have the knack of kneading just the perfect brain muscles to get it going.
At the end, believe that postpartum depression is real, and do consult a specialist if you feel the symptoms, the anxiety, the lack of a normal sexual drive and attraction of the physical nature, towards your partner; anything which you seem has changed post pregnancy, that does not seem normal. The results will indeed be positive for there is no way in which you may lose your sexual appetite forever. The drive returns, and slowly and steadily, goes back to normal, bringing your sex life on track. So, in no way is this form of depression permanent.
Pregnancy is beautiful, and so is parenthood. Don’t let postpartum depression become a monster in your closet. Treat it, fight it, and feel the completeness, replete with physical desires, motherhood, and the love which envelops you double-fold now.